Category Archives: Money

Spiritual Advance Directive

 

Every adult needs to complete an advance directive (and that means you, too!). It is the health care planning document that medical professionals follow if a patient becomes too ill to speak for him or herself. It gives your loved one the option to name someone as decision maker. And it is the place he or she can state preferences regarding life-sustaining treatment.

More than medicine

Death and dying is more than a medical event, however. Like birth, a family member’s death is a profound part of a family’s life journey. Just as an expectant mom might contemplate where to give birth and the emotional tone of the environment, your loved one may have thoughts about where to die and those surroundings. This may involve his or her religious or spiritual beliefs and preferences. Or may simply reflect personal rituals and symbols. The advance directive is a vehicle for your relative to describe these wishes, but you might need to start the conversation.

Some questions you might ask:

  • Is there anything you would like us to do that is rooted in your faith? Tell us everything you can about what you might like. Any faith leader you would like us to call?
  • Where would you prefer to pass? At home? Somewhere else?
  • How do you envision the room? Special photos or prayers? Poems or music?
  • To provide a sense of who you are, how shall we describe you to the doctors, nurses, or other helpers who may not have met you before? “Above all, he/she was a person who _____.”

A final gift

Capture your relative’s wishes on paper. Have him or her sign the document and attach it to the advance directive. Knowing your loved one’s spiritual wishes enables you to give him or her a final gift of comfort and dignity.

Is this an uncomfortable topic?

We at Senior Life Management understand this is not always an easy discussion. As the Orange County experts in family caregiving, we can help you and your loved one get started on an advance directive and even explore these more personal, very meaningful aspects—”spiritual planning.” Give us a call at 949-716-1266.

Before you Quit your Job

quit job

It may be true: Your aging relative needs more and more care. You know you are the best person for the job. But it’s too much to do on top of your own work. Think twice before exiting the workforce, however. There are some stiff financial consequences.

For example, if you are mid-career, you are in your prime income-earning years. This is when you want to double down on retirement savings. If your employer offers retirement matching funds, you want to be in a position to grab them! And continue contributing to Social Security.

According to a Met Life study:

Men age 50 and over who left work to care for a parent lost an average of $89,107 in wages. The impact on their Social Security benefits was $144,609. Loss of pension income, $50,000. Altogether, early retirement cost male employees $283,716 over their lifetime. Caregiving women age 50 and over got hit much harder. They tended to leave work sooner. Lost wages averaged $142,693. Women lost $131,351 in Social Security. Figuring lost pension at $50,000, early retirement cost female employees $324,044.

Consider these options:

Hiring help at home may be less expensive than losing your wages. Suggest sharing the cost with your siblings. (Show them this article!) Then no one among you bears the sole financial burden. You might take advantage of an adult day center to provide care during your work hours. Ask about flex-time options so you can work when others can care for mom or dad. Investigate Family Medical Leave. If your company is big enough, you may be able to take weeks or months off. (It is unpaid.) That may get you through a crisis and buy you time to make other arrangements.

In your generous desire to help, be careful you don’t shortchange your own future.

Thinking of a family vacation?

At Senior Life Management we have observed that a special family trip builds priceless memories. Don’t let a disability quash the thought! As the Orange County experts in family caregiving, we can help you identify needed support services and find an outing that matches well with your loved one’s abilities. Give us a call at 949-716-1266.

To find the accessibility of national parks service, go to the National Park Service website. Select a park of interest. Under the “Plan Your Visit” menu, go to the page for Accessibility.